Perfect Mess of a Life: Throwback

Let's all face the fact that even though life does things that makes us unhappy, it works out in the end. In order to receive happiness, we must suffer. I am sorry, but if I had the power to make everyone happy, I would. Life is unfair, and I do not mind it. As a kid, everything was slower and easy going, but every good thing must end.

I just wanted to put together a quick blog before I go. Thank you and have a nice day :). Love, peace, fleet foxes, and years around the sun.

P.S. I have a question. How was the world different from when you were younger? Do you still reminisce on your friendship?




By the way, guess what the picture does this represent (hint: it's a band).

Coffee Relieves Stress

Hopefully, no one us stressed out because anxiety in this world is abnormally big. I am just saying. I kid you not, but people in my school have their noses in their books 24/7. But the title, is a total lie, unless you are me. Coffee tastes yummy, so yay.

My friend ran away from his mother's home in Missouri City and went to Brownsville to his father. Long story short, he did not even tell me, say goodbye, or at least warn. It happened so quick, literally last night. So, please come back home.

Thank god, I am ahead on my schoolwork because I have been so unproductive lately. Lets be honest, I really need to just, I do not even know. Goodness gracious, I feel stupid.

Anyway, I have little nicks and cuts all over my left arm and hand, and I have no idea why it is happening. I have a clean right hand and arm, but it seems like my left side is just acting up today.

My legs burn from roller skating and contemporary class. Ugh, ok, bye :).

By the way, on YouTube, ConnorFranta just uploaded a new video yesterday, and I think you all will love it because I do. It is very funny :).

Ok, to keep from rambling or typing nonsense on this blog, I have to go do homework, (but I do not want to). All right, bye now.

With love,
VioletSarBleu

Confessions

There are so many things wrong with me. So many secrets to tell. I have literally no shame because I told at least one person every single secret of my life. My sister can write or direct an embarassing movie about my life, and it will be at least 16 hours long, or have its own saga or will last around 10 years. Who knows? So, to save you from reading a book or watching a long movie or watching a movie series for 10 years (*cough* Harry Potter). I am so going to regret this later. It might become a multi-part series since I have too many secrets and embarassing moments to tell you.

1. I do not know how to ride a bike, and I am a teenager.

2. I accidently wore a dress backwards and got away with it twice.

3. (Beware: very embarassing). In kindergarten, I wore my skort backwards (skirt in the front, shorts in theback) all school day long.

4. I have a twin sister and was afraid that I will be conjoined with her if I spent too much time with each other.

5. I did not like putting my feet in first position (ballet) because I thought my heels will get stuck together and will be a mermaid for the rest of eternity.

6. I used to cover my whole entire body with a blanket when I went to bed because if a kidnapper ever went into my home, I thought I might as well have some type of protection.

7. My weight was not good. I was fat. And was fat until I was around eight.

8. I had silver dental crowns on my two front teeth on the top, so it looked like I had a semi-grill. Kids made fun of me and will pretend that magnets were attracted to the teeth, they were brutal :).

9. I thought boys had cooties until I was 11.

10. My dad let me watch a horror movie, specifically Friday the 13th, when I was 8. It was so scary that I could not sleep for the rest of the night.

11. I wear a 0 in pants or a 25.

12. My biggest fear was to get into a black hole, so I never wanted to be an astronaut.

13. This one time, I did not know how to zip up and buckle my pants, so when I was walking out of a bathroom, my pants fell, and everyone saw my underwear. I was in kindergarten and wearing purple floral underwear.

14. I punched my sisters' face when I was around 8, and she had a bruise for at least 8 months.

15. I wear sweatpants nonstop. Laziness, I know, not a good thing, but what are you going to do?

16. When I was 4, I slammed the door on my sister because I was mad at her. Her toe got stuck in the hole between the floor and the door on the bottom. I was scared that her toe had to be chopped off since amputation was another nightmare.

17. I overplucked my eyebrow when I was 11, and it was only one eyebrow. I covered it with my hair until it grew back.

18. I thought 4/20 was "weave" day, not "weed" day. If you are old enough, you are laughing in my face or shaking your head. If you are not old enough, don't worry about, you will learn.

20. I prefer wearing dresses over skinny jeans because dresses are more comfortable than skinny jeans.

21. I use old lady face products (those garnered towards the older audience).

22. Babies have polar feelings to me. Either they laugh hysterically or they cry hysterically.

23. My sister is not really my best friend. My grandma is my best friend, yeah buddy.

24. My eyes get murky and muddy looking when I am upset and caramel when I am happy. That is just the way I am.

25. In times of severe despair, I lay down on my front lawn.

26. I have never had a nose bleed.

27. I ate Playdoh, smells like uncooked vanilla cookie dough, but tastes so gross and it was gritty, not smooth.

28. I wanted to be cool and chewed gum. I did not like to, but I did. Gum got stuck in my hair at least 6 times, and my mother had to put peanut butter in my hair to get it out. She did it in the kitchen, and it was embarassing.

With Love,

Violet Sar Bleu

Obsessions and Addictions

Ok, lately, I have been happier and more smilier than usual. Not my pessimisstic self, which is awesome. I love being happy, and you should too. :) If you are sad or unhappy or angry, I cannot do anything about it, but I wish the best for you. Anyway, this is a list of my old and new obsessions and addictions, not the bad ones, promise :). Here we go.

Obsessions:

1. YouTube Videos: I absolutely love YouTube videos because they are awesome. Many of the ones I watch are just funny people. Funny people are awesome. Here are some links to the channels I watch.

-http://www.youtube.com/user/our2ndlife: I absolutely love this channel because it is funny, filled with funny videos, and it makes me smile all the time. You are missing out if you do not watch this because it is that good. They upload on different days, and on those days, they have a different person to do it. It is just an awesome channel, made by awesome people. If you like funny people, then this channel is perfect for you.

-http://www.youtube.com/user/ConnorFranta: I love this channel too. Again, funny videos, most of them have no use, but a great channel. It makes me smile everytime I watch it, and that is all that matters. It just makes my day brighter, so I want your day brighter, so watch. He also has a second channel too.

-http://www.youtube.com/user/PICKLEandBANANA: Again, funny guy, funny videos. My smile gets bigger, and I love that. Watch it, I am not even kidding. If you do not, you are missing out on something that kills time (and great personalities)

-http://www.youtube.com/user/swoozie06?feature=chclk: From deep down disccussions to hilarious stories, this guy is the right for you. He makes people smile and that should be his professional job. Yes, the stereotypical videos nowadays, but they are good videos. Watch them.

2. Sundresses and Rompers: Not the trampy ones, but the ones that you just thrown on when you do not know what to wear. It is one piece and easy to just wear. I am a very lazy person and indecisive person, so wearing an outfit in one piece makes everything better. Also, it is near 80 degrees Farenheit where I live, so it is cooking. Wearing jeans makes your legs sweat like no other, so dresses and rompers are my best friends.

3. Portraits: I have been working on my portrait skills right now, and let me tell you, my Andrew Jackson looks like a across between Edward Scissorhands and Alan Rickman. Yeah, I love Edward and Alan, but my goodness, it looks so wrong. If you want to see it, comment below and I will put it in my next post.

4. Pyschology: I have been looking into pyschology, and I love it, To me, it is amazing. The human mind and the animal mind are so fascinatiing. I cannot say more.

5. Horror Films: I just love the feeling of being scared. It is the best rush ever. :). Anyway, I love horror films. Do you love them? What are your favorite?

Addictions:

1.Coffee: I literally drink at least 3 cups of coffee everday. Usually, it is not even in the morning, it is after school when I do this. I just feel so stressed out, and coffee relieves my stress. It cannot be healthy. I tried tea, and I hate soda, so coffee is so yummy. I can just buy it and make it and drink it.

2. Ice Cream: If one food can be healthy, it has to be ice cream. I love ice cream. They are good for being good to your soul. I know it is not good for you, but I do not eat it often. My favorite flavor is mint chocolate chip. What is yours?

3. YouTube Videos: If you are ever wondering why I never do my work until 8:00 pm, it is because of YouTube. The music, the channels I listed above, and random stuff make me laugh and smile. I actually learn to manage my time better, so yay.

4. Music: Some people do not listen to music. If you are one of these people, tell me how because I want to know how you do it. I want to understand. Music makes my life better, without it I will just exist.

Ok, that is my list of obsessions and addictions, well some :). If you have any requests, tell me. If you have any questions, ask me. If you have any thoughts, think it and then tell me. Thank you and have a nice day.

With Love,

Violet Sar Bleu

P.S. I doubt I offended anyone, so if I did, you know the drill. Thank you. :)

Pop tarts and Popsicles

I had a every good day today, but I do not know why. Smiling like an idiot and being cheery was my thing. Happiness ran over me as the corruption in the government. It is very unlikely that I have a good day. Why? I do not know. Maybe it is because I had a very long weekend or that I am finally in peace with myself.

Today is the best Monday ever. Why? Because it is Tuesday :p. See what I did there? Anyway, I just wanted to share to you that I am happy and I feel free. I am free today. The reason is unknown, but whatever it is, I love it.

I hope you are having a good day/good night. I only wish for the best, not the worse. Happiness is an unalienable right, so remember that.

By the way, don't you hate it when you are having a fantastic day and someone comes by and ruins it? Worse feeling ever, but do not let it get to you. However, if you are angry, express your anger. If you are sad, cry. If you are happy, smile. Do not be afraid to show your emotions. I know that not everyone can be an open book, but showing your emotions is not weak. It is strong. Not showing your emotions is also strong.

With Love,

Violet Sar Bleu

List of Things I Would Like

Here's a list of things I would like to obtain at least once in my lifetime. Now, these aren't material things. These are actual objects that mean something. So here it goes :).

1. A close group of friends that I will cherish for the rest of my life.
I do not care if I meet them in high school, where I do have a close group of friends. I do not care if I meet them in a nursery home. I just want a close group of friends I can joke around and be a fool I'm front of. Also, friends who support me. I do have friends as so, but who knows? :)

2. Children
Even though I despise certain children, I will like to have some of my own someday. It will be a long time, but I just want someone to raise from a blank canvas so that they can color in their own picture.

3. A first love aka puppy love.
Just someone I will happily say that I fell in love with. The first person who makes me realize what love is. Again, I will wait.

4. A friend, other than my sister, who understands me.
My sister is the only person who've dealt with me for so long and has never left, probably because she cannot. Anyway, just someone who understands me as much as my sister does.

5. A tattoo worthy moment.
Just something so extraordinary that I have to ink myself to do so.

Things that make me feel happy

1. I do not think I said this before, but nothing makes me feel much more complete than sitting in the backseat of the car as my mom is driving. With my feet in my sister's lap and my legs stretched out on the backseat, I feel complete on land. Listening to good music as we are driving to an unknown destination.

2. Me being in the beach in waist high water as the waves push me back and forth. There, I am complete.

3. White chocolate covered pretzels with peppermint flakes over it. This more for just when I have a slight iffy in my life, not a permanent solution.

Yes, yes, so that is the end of it. I'd you have any thoughts or comments, leave them below. Until next time.

With Love,

Violet Sar Bleu

Be Yourself Because Everyone Else is Taken

Girls try too hard to be clones of each other. Why try to fit in and be uncomfortable when you can be yourself and be comfortable? It makes no sense to me. If people bully you because you are a tad bit different, the joke is on them, since they do not realize how beautiful you are. Everyone has a flaw. Instead of wanting to change it, make it your own.

Everyone has something wrong about themselves. Something. Albeit a medical condition, pyschological condition, physical condition, etc. etc. But, do not make it your excuse of why you can or cannot do things. Make it your advantage instead. By doing so, it is character building.

In my school, there a group of kind kids. They go to church, apparently are honest, apparently do not gossip, and have all A's. However, I am a bit skeptical, like many others. I do not believe it. In my view, it looks posed. As in almost they are waiting for someone to try to take a picture of them doing something wrong, when they can't. If you are not perfect, like most of us here, show that. Because not only are being honest with yourself, you avoid that posed look.

I lose friends who I assume are kindest people on the planet. On the contrary, I keep friends who I had a bad judgement on them before. Assumptions are usually wrong, but once you get to know the person better, go with your instinct.

I love my friends. Not because they are kind (which they are), but it is the fact that they understand me. Everyday we will sit at the same table every morning at school before first period and do not have to say a word to each other. One look in the eye can say so much about our day. If someone is angry, we let them rant. If someone is tired, we give them our jacket, so that they can sleep. If someone is saddened, we hug and comfort them. If someone is just over the moon happy, we let them tell us about their day no matter how bad our day is going. They support me no matter what. My other aquaintances are no competition for my friends.

When I am in the car, I always sit in the backseat with my sister if my mom and her boyfriend are in the car as well. I always stretch out my legs and put my feet on top of my sister's lap since my legs are too long for the average car. I feel complete. We can drive for hours, and I love every minute of it. This is the only way I feel complete in land. In the ocean, when the wave sways me back and forth, I am complete.

With Love,

Violet Sar Bleu

Things to do before We become Adults Part 1

As I said before, in order to be a flower, we must bloom, but we all bloom at different rates. Of course, before we to into the world of mortgages, tax reduction, and electricity bills, we have all the freedom we want to read any book, watch any movie, hear any song, and learn from we need to learn.  This is a list of things I believe we all need to do in order to become a complete person, an adult. However, adults keep doing what they do, so this list will be different for everyone. This is just mine.

Books to Read:

1. Thirteen Reasons Why by Jay Asher
In my opinion, in order to fully loose our innocence and childlike demur, we have to know sucicide and why people do it. Even though this novel is fictional, it tells other people's lives, thus is real. Beware, this book will haunt and follow us for days.

2. Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky
I read this book recreationally in my freshman year, and it became my guide. Thank you, Charlie. It is one of those books where it understands us, where it represents us. The hard times, the better times, and the ugly times, but it makes sense. Thank you, Stephen.

3. Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
I read this book so quickly, it was ridiculous. The use of profanity is used extensively. But without it, it loses that character. Every person is rebellious in their own way because there is something about the world we hate. Holden represents that, but in a more extremist way. Beware because you may have a pessimistic mood for a week after reading this.

4. Night by Elie Wiesel
The Holocaust at a first hand account. In order to see light, we must see the darkness, even the darkest of them all. It is so beautifully written, and because of the lack of detail, everything feels real. It is not fake. It is real. War is real.

5. A Nicholas Sparks Novel
Even though these novels are probably the most unrealistic relationships ever. We must experience love in order to fully become a person. The world without love is a world without picture. It is the paint to our canvas that makes everything clearer.

6. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzergerald
The roaring 20s, setting cannot get better than that. Just read it, it really is a gem in the sky.

7. A Separate Peace by John Knowles
A World War II novel that features betrayal, friendship, and denial. I think those three words can sum up why we do things. John Knowles gives us an explanation of why his narrator does his actions, so it helps us learn from their mistakes.

Movies to Watch:

1. The Breakfast Club
A true classic that cannot be repeated. Kids in detention, revealing secrets who are polarities of the high school stereotypes. What can be greater than that?

2. The Shawshank Redemption
Harsh language, yes. Prison, yes. A lovely film about two men friendship. And there is Morgan Freeman, so yay.

3. Full Metal Jacket
I am a sucker for good war films, and this was set in the Vietnam War which is a very interesting time period. Again, war is part of losing ones innocence.

4. American Beauty
Sexuality and sensuality are played very straight forward in this film. Lust, love, and infatuation.

Things to do:

1. Stay at the beach, all day.

2. Go to the amusement park.

3. Eat In-n-Out Burger

4. Have a pool party

5. Fall in love so hard that your heart takes over your head.

Here is part 1 of my lists to do before you become an adult. What do you believe? What will be your list? Why might be?

With Love,

Violet Sar Bleu

Leave the Past, Live in the Present, Wait for the Future

Call me crazy, but I believe in fate. Everything happens for a reason, whether it be good or bad. There is a reason why I meet people who I begin to love and then do not love any more. There is a reason why I meet people who I just love unconditionally. I learn things. I believe in miracles even though natural laws and deism tells me not so.

Important lessons literature has taught me include nothing lasts forever, time will heal all wounds, love should not hurt, etc. Even though they may seem just words on a piece of paper, wisdom and full of thought are written just for you on the page. They want us to read the downfalls of the characters so that we may learn from others mistakes, but we have to make our own in the process. Everyone grows up at different times, different rates, different ways. I just somehow grew up mentally faster than my past friends, therefore saw them as inexperienced. They got bored of me. I was tired of seeing them get hurt, so I left. It is fine to be mature for your age, but we have to grow in order to be full person.

My family always told me that I was their busy bee to their pretty flower. Even though I am not perfect, I am still distinguished. I am here.

There is a difference between existing and living. If we are living, we are living they way we want to, the way we seize the day, the way we take control over how fast time goes by for us. Existing just means that you are letting the day seize you. Take control over your life and live the way you want to.

I never fell in love before. I do love people, but I have never fell in love before until my heart takes over my brain. That never happened, no matter how many people I met. I tried to make myself fall in love with them, but I could not. It just would not be fair to anyone if I did.

Planning things out has not been good to me. I prefer to just go with the flow. That is all I want. All I want is to get married, have children, live with my husband/best friend, live near water, and be happy. That is all I want.

Happiness is a huge deal for me. If someone tries to ruin my day, I will hurt them. Let me have a good day. Let others have a good day.

Only time will tell. We cannot predict everything.

With love,

Violet Sar Bleu

My Ex~Friend Story

I used to have this amazing friend. He was my shoulder to lean on, the net to catch me when I fall, the rock that made my life easier, but that all changed. He is never there for me anymore, when I see him, he acts as though I am a total stranger.

Our Friendship before:

We would make jokes, see how we were everyday, and made sure no one jar,Ed one another. Lets just say, we tried to be each other's bubble. He dated girls that were kind and sweet to me and eventually became my friends. We can have intimate and meaningful conversations with each other without a problem. Inside jokes were our thing, and we were not afraid to make fun of each other since we were not afraid to hurt each other. I was very close to him, like a brother.

Our Friendship going Downhill:

He started to hang out with people in a million years he would not, and changed himself in order to fit in. Eventually, we started growing apart, and my friend is no longer recognizable. He is just a different person in the same body. I denied that we were growing apart, but after a while I knew it ended.

Lesson Learned:

Not everything stays the same forever.

With Love,

Violet Sar Bleu

Things that I will Never Do

I know what I want. I know what I want to do. No one can stop me. Only I can. I know what is right for me and what is wrong. I know all of those things, and I should not have to prove it to anyone. We do not have to prove anything to anyone else other than ourselves. If we do, our lives will not be about taking it day by day, but the other route that I dread. Planning is not in my blood. I write my story in ink, not pencil, because I know my mistakes. I felt as though I needed something to prove myself with because I think I have been too relaxed, too comfortable with life, so I decided to make a list of actions that I will never perform. Again, this is not to insult anyone.

1. I will never marry a man similiar to my father. If you know anything about my father, he was the one who took away my happiness and gave it to my stepsister. I can only pretend to stay happy so long. Also, in every relationship he had, he ended. He went through 3 wives and probably ended because he is a control freak. He traps me. Sorry, I am not Rapunzel. I will not wait.

2. I will never raise a child that is similiar to my stepsister. As harsh it may sound, lets just say my younger stepsister was not raised in a way I believed that I would raise her. She is eight, yet she acts or believes as so she is 3. Kids understand, by age 6 that life is not perfect and not everything goes their way. However, she did not learn that yet, and my father denies that life is imperfect. I would never do that. My grandmother told me that life will end one day for me when I was 3.

3. I will never wear my heart on my sleeve again. My emotions get the best of me, and the worst events that ever happen, happen. I will never show emotions bluntly to anyone because I always get hurt. I always get taken advantage of, and I do not want that to happen ever again. Some people, it works on them, but it does not work on me.

4. I will never divorce. Marriage is something that I hold very dear to my heart. I believe that marriage should last, and people just get married just to get married. I want thought in my relationship. I do not want to marry and then divorce. That ruins the whole point of marriage.

5. I will never let people control my opinions. As we can tell, I am very opinionated. If someone tries to control or change my opinion, they are gone from my life. The only things that are part of my identity are my opinions and my morals. That is all I have because I look my sister since we are twins and people have the same name as me.

6. I will never say "I do not sin". If someone tells me that they do not sin, they just did. Everyone sins no matter what. That is just saying that we are perfect. Sorry, have you seen us? We are humans and imperfect. We sin. It is hypocritcal and dumb to say that.

7. I will never cut my hair into a bob. Short hair does not go well with my facial structure since it is so harsh. I do not want to emphasize the harshness of my facial structure.

8. I will never be friends with people I do not like. This statement does not exactly mean that I will be unfriendly. It just means that between the people I do not like and I, we are neutral. That is all.

9. I will never lie to someone in order to satisfy them. I do lie and only tell part of the truth. We do that, but I would not say something of my opinion that is faulty. It is dishonest and kind of rude to the other person because we are just saying that we will let them go out looking like a fool.

10. I will never drink an elxir of life. If some genius creates an elxir of life, I would not drink it because I do not want to live forever? What am I going to do when I already did everything I want? Don't I want to rest for the rest of eternity?

11. I will never harm someone emotionally in a relationship purposely. This includes friendships, boyfriend/girlfriend type deals, and sisterly relationship. I would never try to do something to my friend or sister in order to hurt their mind. It is unfair. They do that to me, but everyone deserves to live life freely.

12. I will never wash darks with lights in clothing. A no brainer, common sense.

13. I will never be my old self again. My old self, as in what I was in the 6th grade, is nothing like me now and would probably dislike me for what I have become. Even though my old self hates me, I do not hate me. I am fine with myself. I cannot be my old self again because of experience and growing. It would not be possible.

14. I will never force my future children to be something they are not. This does not include behavior wise. What I mean is by dressing and talking and their nature. Every person is born an original, do not be a copy. There is a reason why you are that way.

15. I will never eat after midnight. I do not do anyways, and it is unhealthy, so I do not do it. It makes me uncomfortable too.

16. I will never date a stuck-up kid or a controlling person. I have a list of turn-offs and none of them include anything physical. It is mostly about character. If there is something I do not like about someone's character, I would not date them. That is just the way I am.

All right, here is a list of things I will never do because I wanted to prove to myself and commit myself to this list. I am exhausted. Love you all. I think you know what is process for the "insults, offenses, etc."

What will be things you will never do? Why? Do you believe back in the past you would have done them?

With Love,

Violet Sar Bleu

List of Possible Senseless Thoughts

I have been very relaxed over the past couple days when I went back to school, and I feel as though I am not overwhelmed by the boatloads of homework. Just taking it one day at a time which really helps. Right now, my blogging has been inconsistent because my life is inconsistent. I do not what will happen next, but that is just the beauty. By the way, I broke my retainer. Yeah, it snapped somehow, don't ask because the story is bizarre. Anyway, these are some of my thoughts that I running through my mind right now.

1. I have been losing my appetite. That is not good. I am meant to eat like a trucker like I always do, but with class. Yeah, I do not feel well, so forgive me if I sound boring during this post.

2. I noticed that I do not or have not had a crush on anyone this year. No one caught my eye. Usually, I have one for a point in time, but I do not. It is not that the boys at my school are ugly, I just think that I know them too well.

3. I have been very relaxed. Life is not busy, and I am happy. Thank goodness. Ranting has been put to a minimum which is fanastic. Not so angry anymore.

4. My sister does not want to be a Catholic anymore.

5. I am not a big fan of chick flicks because they make everyone think what a relationship should turn out to be. Every relationship has its own pace, its own road, its own path. We cannot make a prototype for it. Also, I feel bad for males since every single women expect them to act like a chick flick guy (even me sometimes).

6. Do not. Whatever anyone does to me. Do not take my happiness in order to make someone else happy. It is wrong. Also, no one should deserve this.

7. As much as I do not like people, I hate it when people get hurt. It is not right. It is worse when they cry.

8. Sunflowers and Lily of the Valley are my favorite flowers. Sunflowers are beautiful and bright and happy to me. Lily of the Valley is great to since it looks old-fashion and peaceful. Bright and peaceful are my favorite adjectives.

9. Falling in love. Yikes, a very difficult subject. Should not be treated lightly.

10. Have you ever put vanilla bean creamer inside hot chocolate? It tastes amazing. So creamy and rich.

11. I prefer horror movies because I like to be scared. That rush feels amazing, but the nightmares after are terrible. Yes, but I do not like disgusting "horror" films. They are not entertaining to me.

12. I hate it when people are overly religious. Express your faith, but do not get mad if I do not agree with society's beliefs.

13. Society cannot tell what is right and wrong for every person. Again, this goes back to the flower, how every flower blooms the same.

14. "You Only Live Once"- This expression should not be used to do something stupid. It should be used only when it is a big life decision or daring action, not to do something dumb.

15. Do not get mad at me when I do not know American football or YOLO because I do not watch American football nor have I ever heard YOLO.

16. I am all for true love, but do not flirt with other people's boyfriend and girlfriend. If they really do love you, they will go for you. But if they are in a relationship, do not bother them because they are happy. Only time will tell.

17. I wish my classmates stopped giving anxiety. Sorry, but I do not stress about every assignment because I do not like doing that to my body. It is not fair that my classmates are giving me anxiety. This is why I prefer to be friends with people outside of class.

18. Family and work do not go together.

19. Do not complain about how I do not plan everything out. Go with the flow. No matter what, we will reach hardships.

20. I do not like most people at my school. We have a hallway issue, someone of you know what I mean. We also have a dress code issue. In the summer in Texas, it is too hot to not wear shorts. We also have people who just get on my nerves in my classroom. Some of them are plain annoying. I do not speak at all in school, but some just think they are better than me. In the end, we will buried in the ground. We are equal.

I apologize if I insult you in any way. If I do (I did), send your reason and I will send you an apology. Insults on my behalf are unintended. If you have any thoughts or ideas or comments, comment below.

Sorry that this ended in a sour note, but I cannot go through life without having an outlet. It is impossible. Some things bother me until I go insane. I do not want to go insane.

How are you? How was your holiday? Thank you for supporting me.

With Love,

Violet Sar Bleu

Modern Take on 90s Grunge

I absolutely love the 90s grunge trend. Even though I was pretty young (I wore jelly shoes), I still love this trend. Yes, it is pretty late to start dressing full-on grunge (if you do it regularly already, rock it). From the boyfriend jeans to the messy hair, I love this trend. But, people may look at it as outdated. Of course, lets put a modern take on it so it won't look so outdated.

1. Plaid Shirt
Popularized by Kurt Cobain of Nirvana, this plaid shirt was a staple of the 90s grunge. Nowadays, it is still a staple, so it will not look outdated if you wear today. So, instead of trying to put a modern take on the plaid shirt, lets do a 90s twist.


Forever 21



Vans

 
                                                                                

American Eagle



Wet Seal














I find that men's plaid shirts are not only more comfortable, but they also have a better silouette. Pairing it with a distressed denim short and black crop top underneath makes the outfit more 90s grunge approtiate. Add Vans to keep that grunge vibe. Bonus if the shirt comes a litttle lower than the shorts.

2. Distressed Baggy Jeans
The 90s grunge did not only popularized the plaid shirt, but also the distressed baggy jean, which is now been modernized to the boyfriend jean. It screams rebellion with the many holes, but also give comfort considering how loose these are on the body. I will keep the bagginess of the jeans, along with the holes, but I will make the top more fitted so that we won't look so boxy.



Zara



Delias



Steve Madden

                                         

If we were in the 90s, these pair of jeans would have been bought and the holes will be made bigger with either a nail filer or a pair of tweezers (I learned this from my mom) and will be paired with a baggy vintage band tee shirt, a plaid shirt, and Doc Martens. But, we want this to keep it modern, so I paired it with a fitted floral shirt that will off balance the masculinity and bagginess of the jeans, but the studded flats bring some edge.

3. Little Grunge Dress
Whenever I think of 90s grunge, I always seem to picture a teenage girl with this babydoll or floral dress that is edged up. Of course, I want to recreate this look because I think it is so iconic of this time period. I actually do not want to modernized this look because it is so great already.



Free People



Levis



Asos



Topshop




Steve Madden















First off I want to say that it took me forever to find that babydoll dress with a grunge vibe. If you want to get a grungy babydoll or a grungy floral dress, I recommend going to a thrift store or raiding your mother's or older sister's closet to get one. The denim jacket was another iconic item in the 90s, and the ripped tights give it the grungy attitude, since it was all about anti-fashion. Of course, the bowler hat makes it even more grungy, finish off with a pair of combat boots which were also iconic of the decade.

4. Vintage Band Tee Shirt
Many of the hipsters today are still rocking the vintage band tee shirt. I love these especially because it emphasized the anti-fashion, anti-label of the 90s and are uber comfortable. Nowadays, if we paired our vintage band tee shirt with baggy jeans, layer a flannel, and wear it with Doc Martens, we look like as if we are supposed to be in that era. If you like that look, go right ahead, but I would like to modernize it.



Vintage



Windsor



debenhams.com



Urban Outfitters














Again, the band tee shirt can be a popular band now or then, but if you are trying to find an older band that is not Pink Floyd or Pearl Jam or Nirvana, it is best to go to a thrift store. The faux leather skirt is girly, yet edgy, perfect for the shirt, and the oxfords give it masculinity. Since it is winter in most areas on Earth (50%), I paired tights to keep it warm. I think the dark colors give it that edgieness that the 90s loved without going full on with the Doc Martens and loose clothing. For the band tee shirt, I think you should avoid any pop or hip hop because it just would be too ironic.

5. Bonus: Jelly Shoes
If you were like me and were not old enough to know and dress in grungy way, you probably wore jelly shoes. Yes, I thought was so super cool when I wore these because you could see my entire feet (rebel :)). Anyway, I want to pay homage to these ugly shoes.



NastyGal

                                                     


Dorthy Perkins














Nowadays, kids do not wear jelly shoes, but these were made to prevent worn and stains on the shoes. The sundress paired with the jelly shoes would have been typical of a young child. Add accessories if you want.

What do you think of 90s grunge? Do you like it or not? Why? Place your comment below. Again, if I insulted you, I apologize.

Take it easy,

Violet Sar Bleu

Favorite Beauty Products Part 2

The other post was more garnered towards skin care and lip care. I will carry on with that, so I hope you do not mind and will give other products that are not garnered towards skin or lip care. :)

1. Favorite Blush- Benetint by Benefit

I only wear blush if I seriously look dead, which includes exam days and sick days. I barely use this, but it gives me a natural flush instead of like a clown. Since it is a liquid blush, it absorbs into your skin. This color works better on cooler skin tones. If you have a warmer skin tone, try the posie tint instead :).

2. Favorite All Around Use Product- Rosebud Salve

I actually do not use this as a lip balm because it does not work, but I use it for other things. It works great on my hands and tames flyaways :).

3. Favorite "Shampoo"- Baking Soda

I do not use shampoo on my hair because it strips my hair of its natural oils. Baking soda removes the excess stuff without making it dry :).

4. Favorite "Deep Conditioner"- Olive Oil with Avocado

Again, I prefer to avoid using conditioners because I grew up not using one. Once a week, I mix mashed up avocado with olive oil, and it makes my hair feel so soft and leaves it shiny.

5. Favorite Mask for Dry Skin- Egg Yolk

Egg yolk contains all sorts of goodies for your skin and will moisturize it. I use it once a week.

6. Favorite Everyday Perfume- Daisy by Marc Jacobs

The scent is floral and fun with elegance. I love wearing this scent because it is so carefree and light compared to others that are a bit too much.

Yes, so here is part 2 to the favorite beauty products. Because I have dry skin, I want to know what people with oily skin like to use. What is your favorite face wash? What shampoo do you use? What products in the past you prefer not to use? Does your opinions about some of the products above match mine? If not, why?

If you have any questions or thoughts, comment below.

With love,

Violet Sar Bleu

Favorite Beauty Products Part 1

I seriously do believe that everyone should take care of their body because it is important. One of the key areas that people tend to look at is our face. Yes, so I would like to share to you all what I have been using in terms of skin care and body care.

1. Favorite Skin Cleanser- Neutrogena Oil Free Redness Soothing Cleanser

As a teenager, my face is prone to acne, so this cleanser has been keeping it clear. I especially love this cleanser because my face before was very blotchy, and after using it, my face is no longer blotchy or has any redness around it.

2. Favorite Exflotiator- Forever Aloe Scrub

My skin can get extremely dry in the winter, so this scrub is a must. It scrubs away all of the dead skin and flaky areas of my face and leaves it nice and soft. I use it once a week, but it is formulated for daily use. It is very gentle, so I recommend it if you have dry skin like me.

3. Favorite Dry Skin Repairer- PCA Dry Skin Relief Bar

When my skin is just thirsty for moisture, this repairs it so well and brings moisture back into my skin. It feels so refreshing, and it is a must have because without it, I will have extremely dry skin. Again, I use this once a week, but it is formulated to use everyday. It is also garnered towards an older audience, but it works for me just fine.

4. Favorite Moisturizer- PCA Collagen Hydrator

Again, I have dry skin, and this product works amazingly on my skin. It leaves it soft, and I barely breakout when using this. It does not clog my pores or anything, and the texture is similar to cream cheese which makes it easy to blend into my skin. It is garnered towards an older audience (my grandma uses it too), but it works wonderfully on my teenage skin.

5. Favorite Skin Protector for Face- Neutrogena Ultra Sheer Dry Touch Sunblock

I get burned so easily, so I have to slap my face with sunblock every morning, lunchtime, and at night. This leaves my skin feeling soft and not greasy. It also leaves a slight dewy finish, but not overly shiny like others do. I prefer this sunblock since it is more gentle than others I tried.

5. Favorite Skin Protector for Face- Neutrogena Ultra Sheer Dry Touch Sunblock

I get burned so easily, so I have to slap my face with sunblock every morning, lunchtime, and at night. This leaves my skin feeling soft and not greasy. It also leaves a slight dewy finish, but not overly shiny like others do. I prefer this sunblock since it is more gentle than others I tried.

6. Favorite Sun Protector for Body-  Watermans Applied Science Sun Cream

Not only does my face gets burned easily, but my body as well. This sunscreen lasts all day, and I do not need to reapply throughout the day. I do not mind reapplying for my face, but for my body, it is always a hassle, so I like using this. The texture is easily blended into my skin, and no body parts look shiny.

7. Favorite Lip Balm: Lucas Paw Paw Ointment

This is not popular in the United States, but very popular in Australia, and it works wonderfully. It makes my lips feel soft, not sticky. The lip balm has multiple uses and comes in a tube instead of a stick like your regular Chapstick or a tin like your regular Rosebud Salve. A must have in my purse.

8. Favorite Lip Tint- Fresh Sugar Lip Treatment in Rosé

The color enhances my natural lip color and lasts all day, which I like. It is actually a tinted lip balm, so it is more moisturizing than the average lipstick or lip stain. Also, it is a little sheer, so it does not overpower the lips.

9. Favorite Body Lotion- The Body Shop Body Butter

If you never heard of a body butter, it is just a lotion on steroids. It is creamy and thick and perfect for the dry winter weather. This body butter not only is moisturizing, but also comes into different scents.

10. Favorite Body Soap- Olive Oil with Honey

Forget drying soaps and turn to olive oil and honey. I have extremely dry skin, and I prefer to use olive oil and honey instead of body washes because it does not dry it out, smells amazing, and it cleans my skin.

Hopefully, you find these helpful to guide you to healthier skin :). If you have any questions, just post a comment below and I will answer you back.

With Love,

Violet Sar Bleu

Random Thoughts

1. Not all who wanders are lost. Not all that are lost, wander. A wise person told me that quote a while back, and let's just say I did not believe that they were wise at first. I am a wanderer. I do not believe I am not lost, but I do not have a destination.

2. Take deep long breaths and stop taking short hollow breaths. Just take one thing at a time. Rule of thumb, if we believe that we do so many things in our daily life that we need an assistant, we are overworked. Take things off the to-do list.

3. "You Only Live Once" should not be used as an excuse to do something that is dumb. Should not be used as an excuse to drink until our liver cannot take it anymore. Should not be used to run a red light.

4. Observe our surroundings. The art industry in our area (not only museums, but tattoos, music, etc.). Take a day off at least once every year (Winter Holidays do not count) to observe art. It makes life more open. Trust me, I experienced this.

5. Life should be spent comfortably, in a physical and emotional way. It is not fair to our body if we have to wear 5 inch heels everyday. Our feet will just die. It is not fair to our body if we have to pretend in order to fit in.

6. Happiness should be accesible to everyone. It is not fair if it is not. "Life is not fair". It should be. The only thing that is fair in life is death because no matter how rich we are, no matter how famous we are, no matter how smart, creative, or kind we are, we will be buried in the same ground.

7. People mistake music with sound that has words with it. In my opinion, in order of it to be considered a song, it has to have meaning. The lyrics or the melody has to send out a message. If it has no meaning behind it, it is meaningless.

8. "Art is meaningless in our lives, but our lives without it will be meaningless"-Rasta

9. "There was once a man who became unstuck to the world, he took a wind for a map, a sky for a clock, and set off with no destination. He was never lost"- Craig Anderson

10. "There was once a man who became unstuck to the world. And each person he met became a little less stuck themselves. He traveled only with himself, but he was never alone"- Rasta

11. We have to make mistakes in order to learn. It is just a fact of life. No one goes through life perfectly. We will get beat up and hurt along the way, but it is better that way. We cannot live thinking that we are in this weird fanatsy.

12. I do not agree to many of society's stereotypes. The meanest people I have ever met, I thought were the nicest, maybe because they are sneaky, who knows? The nicest people I have ever met look like the meanest people, who knows why?

13. A person grows up differently, at their own pace. It depends on their timing, not ours. Just like every flower, each person blooms differently. However, every flower must bloom in order to be considered a flower as every person must grow in order to be considered grown.

14. Chapman Hamborg is a wonderful oil painter from Huntington Beach. Look him up, really nice paintings and photographs from him.

15. Tim Hendricks is a wonderful tattoo artist. Look him up, beautiful portraits and I just love his work. He has a blog called Saltwater Tattoo.

16. Another wise person gave me advice. We have to be lost in order to find ourselves. We have to love ourself in order to love someone else.

17. I always wanted to take someone under my wing, to guide them, to show them the world, but whenever I do, it seems as though I learn more from them than the other way around :).

18. My sister told me that life does not go on. Death goes on. Life ends, but Death goes on for centuries.

19. This is going to sound so rude, so just a warning to you all. I cannot stand when people use their sob story or when a person assumes that the other person has a sob story. Yes, I am sorry about (whatever topic), but using our sob stories as an excuse is dumb. We cannot do that. It is not right. Yes, we all have sob stories, but using them to our advantage is so selfish.

20. Go with the flow. I do not like to plan everything out. It is not the way I process. I find things easier if I just go with th flow.

21. Tattoos are just a piece of art. We have so much plain canvas on our bodies, might as well decorate it. (If you do not believe in tattoos, I am not trying to insult you, this is my opinion.)

22. Opinions are neither wrong or correct. However, insults are wrong, and faulty opinions are considered untruthful. We cannot say who is wrong based off of their opinion nor vice versa.

23. No one is born with perfect features, so deal with the imperfections. I am sorry that I get acne once in a while. I am sorry that my face gets dry easily (sometimes, even with moisturizer and exfloitiating, I still get flaky skin in the winter occasionally). I am sorry that I get dark circles. We cannot help how we look. We are human.

24. A person we consider odd may seem perfect in someone else's eyes.

25. The guys in chick-flicks are so overrated. Ever heard of independence and not needing a guy to be happy, directors?

26. L.A. is an evil place. It is just to much criticism. New York is where you want to be.

27. I do not understand the idea of perfection. We are human, and if we were made to be perfect, might as well make every girl look like Barbie and every guy look like Ken.

28. In order to be an artist, we have to express ourselves, not putting out what other people want. Having natural talent does not make us an artist. That is just saying wires make computers. It is how we use our skills in order to create something amazing.

29. Overuse of makeup is unnecessary. Makeup should be used to enhance your natural beauty, not create artificial beauty.

Sorry about the unorganized weird list of my thoughts. Anyway, have a Happy New Year. But seriously, the New Year is getting overrated. Anyway, have a nice day.

If I insulted you in any way, I apologize.

With Love,

Violet Sar Bleu